Author of You Are Not Your Mother: Releasing Generational Trauma & Shame and Difficult Mothers, Adult Daughters: A Guide for Separation, Liberation & Inspiration
who are you beyond the shame you experience?
|
I was silent discoing on the boardwalk yesterday afternoon, reveling in how totally alive I feel when I partake of this relatively-new-to-me activity when a thought barged in: "It's about time you figured this out...too bad it took you until your 60s." Insert sad trombone sound here. I nearly stopped in my tracks and said to myself, "Seriously? That's what you're going to offer me?" But I didn't want to have a full-blown argument with myself, so I simply reminded myself: "How human of me...of course that's where my brain wants to go sometimes." Because here's the thing: I have two identities that sit alongside each other – shame-based Pathetic Loser Eeyore who mopes through life with her head down and intentional Silent Disco Queen who expresses whatever joy wants to flow through her. I mean, I contain multitudes, but for much of my life Eeyore was the default, while Queen was nowhere to be found until I sought her out on purpose. Being able to say to ourselves, in a self-shaming moment, "How human of me..." is an act of re-mothering. Seeking out our favorite selves on purpose is an act of re-mothering. Creating safety so our favorite selves can express themselves is an act of re-mothering. These are skills I share in the next Cycle Breaker Summit (complete with a downloadable worksheet to help you take this practice deeper). By cycle breakers for cycle breakers, the mission of the next Cycle Breaker Summit is to help you re-parent yourself. Over four days (December 9 - 12), 20+ compassionate presenters will share honest approaches to help you remember, embrace, and be your favorite self. The best part? It's free to attend. Click here to get your free ticket. As well, I’ll be doing a Facebook Live answering questions with some of the other participants on Monday, December 9th at 12 noon Pacific/3 p.m. Eastern. Would love to "meet" you there. Much, much love, Karen P.S. If you're on the waitlist for Shame School, stay tuned for a special Black Friday offer (on November 29) for the next round, which starts in February. |
Karen C.L. Anderson
Author of You Are Not Your Mother: Releasing Generational Trauma & Shame and Difficult Mothers, Adult Daughters: A Guide for Separation, Liberation & Inspiration
After two-and-half years of no contact, my mother reached out to me via email. I had a feeling I might hear from her after I received a call from an ER nurse in the town where my she lives (300 miles from where I live). My mother doesn't know the nurse called me. At the time, I did nothing, as nothing was being asked of me. In her email to me, she said she wanted to have a conversation about her future plans as she is getting older and asked me to call her, which I did. We had basically the...
Today (January 31) is the last day to save $250 and get a bonus 1:1 session with me when you join the The Shame School Community. The Shame School Community is a 52-week excursion into the heart of shame: what it is, where it comes from, the myths around it, how it impacts us, and how we can transform our relationship to it and live (mostly*) free from it(*I can't promise complete and total freedom, but I can tell you that when when it does show up it won't impact you the same way) The Shame...
You can put it down now.