Founder of Shame School and author of You Are Not Your Mother: Releasing Generational Trauma & Shame and Difficult Mothers, Adult Daughters: A Guide for Separation, Liberation & Inspiration
on the difference between joy and happiness
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Brittney Cooper on the difference between joy and happiness: "Joy is not based on happiness or things going our way or that all is well in the world. Joy is rooted in a deep internal sense of purpose. That we have a reason to show up here and do our work with righteousness and integrity and care. And any time we secure an sustain the conditions to be able to do that, there is a reason for joy. Particularly for those who believe, even in the face of deep injustice, that ultimately justice will prevail." While this quote was part of a larger conversation she had about the election in the U.S., which takes place today, it's pertinent to anyone who is a cycle-breaker and/or who is reckoning with shame. Many of us were taught to pursue a happiness that was prescribed for us, rather than a joy we define. ~~~ I was featured on my publisher's new website, answering questions you might like the answers to, including how being raised by a narcissistic mother affected me personally, and what the relationship between the mind and the body is and how it plays a role in overcoming trauma (my answer might surprise you). ~~~ Speaking of joy, here's our girl Scout this past Sunday. Much, much love (and joy), Karen |
Karen C.L. Anderson
Founder of Shame School and author of You Are Not Your Mother: Releasing Generational Trauma & Shame and Difficult Mothers, Adult Daughters: A Guide for Separation, Liberation & Inspiration
...that Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche, whom I quoted in my previous email, had a history of sexual abuse and rape of both women and men. Thank you to those who shared this with me. Much, much love, Karen
"Boundaries are your values in action." ~ Randi Buckley When you have an abusive mother it can be hard to discern whether your values are actually yours. Not to mention that sometimes what we see as a value is actually a stress/survival/trauma response. For example, you may say you value compassion and then feel guilty when you set a boundary with your mother. As clinical psychologist Becky Kennedy says, that's not guilt. It's the pressure of being responsible for whatever she's feeling,...
I am thrilled to be one of 12 trauma-informed experts who are part of Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers, a free online event created specifically for those who struggle as a result of a mother wound. Collectively, we are dedicated to helping you overcome the devastating impact of having an emotionally abusive mother. This event takes place September 23 - 25 and each presentation is geared toward this shared experience, making it more effective and relatable than mainstream self-help. My...